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Taking both boys to school in the morning has been lovely. Part of me wishes I had thought to do it sooner. Although the timing is such that I can’t get a shower until after I take Gwen to school. That’s probably why I made Gavin wait for a city bus to take him every morning. Convenience and selfish desires for personal cleanliness.

Yesterday Gwen was upset because she wanted to do something fun with me and all I wanted to do was clean. She had a fair point. So I took a break and told her to get a book and we would read. Occasionally I will take a few minutes in the morning to read to the late start kid before taking them to school. I should have done it more often.

Lately I have a daydream mixed with my visualization of a memory my sister shared with me. She said that when she was the last one in elementary school, our dad would sit with her on the front porch reading before she needed to leave for school. I never had an experience like that and I am happy that she did. What a precious memory. Reading together on the front step before school.

When Gwen and I got home from taking the boys to school, I told her to get a book. We were going to sit in the gazebo and read until it was time to go. She was so excited and said she wanted to read to me. Even better! A friend used to divide her day among her kids. One hour for each kid. She usually spent the hour reading with her daughter.

It was a little chilly this morning so Gwen ran back inside for her denim jacket. I grabbed the SpongeBob blanket and snuggled under it. I would have shared with Gwen but she seemed content in her jacket. Our feet rested on the ottoman between us. Soon the sun burned through the morning gray. Slivers of sunlight fell across our arms and faces warming us up. Gwen still wore her jacket to school. She looked so cute.

For the balance of our time we were absorbed in the world of Ramona Quimby. I hope it’s a moment Gwen will remember and treasure as much as I do.

My daydream, inspired by Candi’s memory, is becoming more clear. I can see Gwen and myself sitting outside with a book every morning before school starts. Then I see us walking to school together. There is no hurry or rush. The world slows down and we are able to enjoy the mornings together. That is my dream.

I see moms walking to school with their kids. The same moms walk to pick them up in the afternoon. It makes me jealous. All I have ever wanted was to live within walking distance of the school.

The schools here are good. We live in a good school district with top notch schools within that district. I know I complain about the schools a lot. Mostly it’s because the schools squelch my daydreams of how I want to spend time with my kids. I want to live in the 1950’s on a quiet street with other young families. That’s what I want! Instead I live in competitive suburbia in a school district that hasn’t had school buses for 30 years!

For now I will keep on dreaming and counting down the days until summer vacation. We have lots of reading to catch up on in the gazebo.

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