Maybe there are 25 empty bottles because I had a wild party with 24 friends. Or maybe it was just one friend and we enable each other’s drinking problem.

Maybe it’s not my fault he was out of town on business recently and I needed something to get me through the week. Maybe it’s not my fault he has been working from home a lot lately. When he does we go through two or three bottles apiece. It’s our tradition. Then there’s weekends … Maybe it’s just what it looks like. I have issues, don’t judge me.

And maybe I could have quit but Gwen’s teacher asked me to save bottles for a class art project. We just won’t think about how quickly I was able to save 25 bottles for her. I filled a Men’s Wearhouse bag with the bottles and handed them to her today. She told me she loved me! I appreciated her preserving my last shred of self esteem. Because the picture effectively murders it.

Gwen had Pizza with the Principal yesterday. She won because her name was drawn. When the kids get a Lifeskills card they turn it in for a drawing. The Lifeskills cards are when a teacher or adult recognizes the student for some sort of good behavior or good choice. Parker has had this privilege too. Gavin never did get Pizza with the Principal but Parker says he got Ice Cream with the Principal. Gavin never went. It was all very confusing. There was no written notification and Gavin wasn’t sure it was even his name that was called at the Flag Salute. Which is entirely possible given the fact that there is another blonde boy his same age named Gavin Wa… They have been in the same class many times.

At least when a kid gets Pizza with the Principal they are given an invitation. It explains what day they can get their special lunch and how they can have either a pepperoni slice or a cheese slice and choice of soda. They can bring fruit or a dessert to supplement the meal if they choose to. Gwen took apple slices.

Gwen: I know why Pizza with the Principal is on Wednesdays! It’s because Tuesday is pizza day and they just give the kids the leftover pizza on Wednesday!

All I could think was let’s hope that’s not true. It’s probably Little Caesar’s Pizza because it’s cheap and nearby. Gwen said she drank juice. I asked her why when she was looking forward to soda. She said that all the soda was gone. Huh. Nice false advertising there Mrs. Principal. Gwen wasn’t the only kid being rewarded yesterday but still. How do you run out of soda?

You know I didn’t drink all the soda. I can’t imagine Diet Coke being an option and that’s about all I drink. Plus I don’t like soda in cans or two liter bottles. It just doesn’t taste as good to me. Maybe the teachers were in desperate need of a little pick-me-up in the middle of the last week before Spring Break. I don’t know what happened. That’s just weird. But Gwen had a good time so I guess that’s all that really mattered.